Life doesn't always give you time to catch your breath. In fact, it frequently plows you under. It is clear that Mike's mom has a small tumor (not a cyst) at/on something called the Ampulla of Vater. There may also be some other mass in the pancreas that her doctor has referred to as a cyst, but that bit is a little murky right now. As I understand it, the Ampulla of Vater is an area near the pancreas, where it meets the small intestine. If the cancer is there, then it is actually referred to as ampullary cancer and is not pancreatic cancer but its own thing. In general, the prognosis is better for this type of cancer because it is usually resectable, whereas pancreatic cancer often is not. Ampullary cancer is also typically detected earlier, which again means a better prognosis - and we do know that the tumor is very small. On the other side, 50% of ampullary cancers have metastasis to the lymph system. This news is all very scary no matter what way you slice it but one always has to hope. There are several more diagnostic procedures to be done, so we're also still working without the complete set of facts. Mike's mom is a very strong woman, though, and is ready to give this, whatever it is, a run for its money.
As for me, and aside from this latest news, I am doing all right. Physically, I sometimes still get whomped by fatigue. I think to myself "I feel pretty good! I still feel pretty good! Hey, this is great! Uh-oh, I'm exhausted." It is clear that a full day at work right now is too much.
Mentally, well, I think this is a different matter. There's all kinds of thoughts racing through my head at all hours that I'd pretty much stuffed because the treatment itself occupies you so much. So now there are Big Questions: how to move forward, how to live with the fear, whether there are changes that need to be made so life is what you want it to be now and not something you wait for "when you're older". Those "I'll get to that someday" things that we all have ought really to be things we make happen for ourselves sooner rather than later. Carpe Diem.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
You know what's strange? Mom was whipped a couple of days ago when she listened to a prognosis she had yet to Google. It was like her brain was exhausted; hence her whole system followed. So I continue with the same advice: rest, lots of chocolate, read a trashy book and watch Mike's movies - that should cure all evils, right?
evan's got some good points!!
and you look *so cute* with your hair!
tho i must confess to thinking you always look cute...spiky hair, short hair, no hair...sheer ohaladorable!
I second the ohaladorable sentiments!!! hehehehe!!!
You'll figure out what's best for you when the time is right - you'll know it in your gut. Just have faith (egads! did I just say THAT word?) that the answer will come!!
and lo siento on the Mom situation too - damn!
i am finding this all so overwhelming
that it makes me want to quit my job live like Queen Latifah and blow all my money for some 2 or 4 years of complete and utter abandon and indulgence - the reality i am 75% adult and practical and what if i am supposed to live another 20 years - could i do that in the poverty i will have created. i would much prefer the emerald city.
i am finding this all so overwhelming
that it makes me want to quit my job live like Queen Latifah and blow all my money for some 2 or 4 years of complete and utter abandon and indulgence - the reality i am 75% adult and practical and what if i am supposed to live another 20 years - could i do that in the poverty i will have created. i would much prefer the emerald city.
Post a Comment